2. I have come to realize that when I talk: I sound extremely sad. Post partum depression is kicking my butt (and as we realized in 1, it's a rather large butt to kick). I want to be happy. But I struggle to make it through each day.
3. I have come to realize that, if I love someone: I tell them. I'm not sure why I feel as if I have to express my love all the time... but I do. If it makes those I love feel great for that second, then I feel good.
4. I have come to realize that I need: to find joy.
5. I have come to realize that I have lost: friendships among the years because of my honesty. However, it's my true friends that understand my blunt honesty and accept me for this.
6. I have come to realize that, I hate it when: I feel self-pity. Which, lately, there has been a lot of this. I need to find strength to live better, happier, and stronger with the new life Brandon and I have brought into the world. Samantha needs me to be a happy person, with love, compassion, and giving 100% all the time.
7. I have come to realize that, if I'm drunk: My southern accent comes out. A lot.
8. I have come to realize that, marriage: takes a lot of work. Especially when a child is added to the family. It's hard to go from a couple to a trio. But with love, it's not the most difficult thing to partake in.
10. I have come to realize that, I will always be: Worried about what people think. It's my major character flaw.
11. I have come to realize that, I like: quiet, sunny days, long walks, shopping way too much, and pictures.
12. I have come to realize that, the last time I cried was: this morning. I have some sort of bug that is doing a number on my digestive system. I feel horrible about leaving Samantha at my mother in laws. I feel as if I'm using her because I'm there all the time with Sam, and I'm never just alone at home... however, I'm not supposed to be alone according to my shrink... not until this PPD passes.
13. I have come to realize that, my cell phone is: wonderful. I love checking my email on it.
14. I have come to realize that, when I wake up in the morning: I struggle to get out of bed. Even with a crying baby.
15. I have come to realize that, before I go to sleep at night: I never pray. When I was little, my mother would always kneel with me beside the bed and we would say our prayers.
God Bless Mommy and Daddy, and Michael and Jason, and Melissa.
God Bless Grandma & Grandpa Meinert.
God Bless Grandma & Grandpa Anderson.
God Bless Aunt Peggy, Uncle John, and Michele and Jennifer.
It's been so long since I've knelt and asked for anyone to be blessed.
16. I have come to realize that, right now I am thinking about: the future. And worrying about it.
17. I have come to realize that, babies: are a blessing. Samantha is beautiful- a little sponge, learning and growing every day.
18.I have come to realize that, when I get on Myspace: I look at everyone's pictures.
19. I have come to realize that, today I will: make it through. I can be strong.
20. I have come to realize that, tomorrow I will: probably struggle again, but take it one day at a time.
21. I have come to realize that, I really want to: do is figure out what to do with life.
22. I have come to realize that the smallest kernel of hope: is that life goes on, even on bad days.
Thanks Hollie. I think I needed my own realizations. I love you.
1 comment:
You are a self fulfilling prophecy! (what I mean by that is, you said you make sure and tell people you love them. And then you loved on me) I love you too :)
Post a Comment